Happy Chinese New Year. :)

Title: Once. In pieces.

I saw your face only once. That was it.
One perfect and stunning look. That was luck.
Met your dark eyes only once. That was it.
Once was too much to bear; once was a lark
to bear. Saw your glasses a thousand times,
saw the back of your head a million times,
heard the sound of your voice a billion times.
Had to glimpse it despite consequences,
before the world settled back into place.
Had to find an arm, shoulders, figures raised
that resembled yours, to repossess caves
of light limpid lifelessness I craved.

Had to lose your face among crowds slowly,
resist, when I had learned to find your face
in the midst of crowds so effortlessly.
Had to lose an arm, shoulders, figures placed
resembling yours, lose your voice without choice,
had to just become deaf, when I had laced
all happiness in the sound of your voice.
Had to erase the back of your head a
million times, your glasses a thousand times,
your eyes only once, that perfect look strayed
only once.

And so you came to me (or did I come
to you?) in pieces, and you left me (or
did I leave you?) in pieces, until parts
of you were slowly wiped out blank and white,
until nothing could subsist- no marks,
until nothing had ever happened- quite…
If it did, it happened only once. Once.