Wednesday, October 28, 2009

My mum was telling me that she felt ugly and lousy about herself- white bumps of lipid fats visible on her dark circles, and pigmentation spots everywhere. I put concealer and loose powder for her and secretly tried to channel my love along with it. You are beautiful. You are beautiful. You are beautiful and I love you.

She told me that my dark circles were worse than hers. Stress lar, I told her. Hate school you know. Boyfriend every day scold me for not doing work and skipping classes. The other day he showed me the number of 'A's he got. I got nothing to show, so I thought of showing him my backside. I think my backside not bad, can get 'A'. She laughed and said, I think his backside nicer. You don't say you, I also stress you know. Husband every day insult me and say I should go for plastic surgery. Always put me down when he is then the one with low self-esteem. Yar lorh, I said, I also think so sial.

Some things don't change. When I was a pimply teenager, she would tell me that my face was like sandpaper. Stress lar, I would tell her. You think sec 5 very easy arh. Want to die because people think I'm stupid. Dunno whether to prove them wrong or prove them right man. She would laugh, aiyah you don't stress leh. The more you stress the more you got acne. Don't forget you look like me. Your face like sand means my face also like sand leh. (The irony? The shade of the concealer that I'm using now is called Sand!)

Take it easy, baby. Sometimes we forget that we are loved. And that eveything will be okay.

You are loved.

Everything will be okay.

My dog just wrote this: pa\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\!


Anonymous said...

i love this. i really really love this.


Anonymous said...

hey faith, carynl here. i really loved reading this one too:)