I just want to share something that my very cute Sylvia taught the few lucky lot of us.
HOW TO NOT COMPLETE YOUR HISTORY ASSIGNMENT AND GET AWAY WITH IT:
1) Do half of the questions, eg, Questions 1-3.
2) When you run out of time, stay calm and do not panic. I repeat, do not panic.
3) Get a piece of empty fullscap paper
4) and staple it to the back of your written answers.
5) Tear three quarters of that empty fullscap paper
6) leaving a dog ear of it dangling, hanging, and clinging for its dear life to the staple lead.
7)Pray hard. Yes. Pray very hard that your dear stapler will save your life.
8) When questioned by X teacher, stay calm and do not panic. I repeat, do not panic.
9) Immediately assume a humble, innocent and extremely hardworking face.
10) If possible, your eyes should enlarge @.@ and should read, "I WORSHIP YOU". Your body language should read, "I WORSHIP YOU" as well.
11) Tell X teacher with a serious voice, "Questions 4 and 5 flew away".
12) Make sure that all your classmates maintain composure and keep very very straight, solemn and serious faces (although they think that the words "flew away" are damn funny and are an obvious giveaway to your lie).
13) If X teacher does not get it, it would be strongly encouraged and advisable for you to start flapping your arms up and down to imitate the movements of your paper flying away. If you encounter difficulties, pretend you are a bird.
(For sound effects, get your classmates to act as nuns from The Sound of Music, clasp their hands together and sing, "How do you solve a problem like Sylvia? How do you catch a cloud and pin it down? Oh how do you make her home work stay and listen to all she says...")
14) X teacher would then be led to think that you have lost your mind due to the severe stress of being in NYJC and learning History
15) And would contact the IMH (Institute of Mental Health)
16) And will cease to pursue after your History assignment.
By the way, the above scenario did NOT happen, although Sylvia was very much tempted to put the idea to the test.
Credits: Sylvia Cheong
Member of The BULLSHIT Club
Received a Commendable Certificate in SLACKitude in the year 2005
*Some parts of the idea were changed and exeggerated upon because the author was very high at the moment.