Why I love my family:

Mum: Do you think I'm fat? My tummy like very big like that.

Me: Nooo. For a woman your age, you are very very well preserved.

Mum: "Preserved"??!!

Me: Er. I mean, very very well maintained...

-

Mum: Your daddy doesn't like to spend time with you. He thinks you're very boring. Do you think you're very boring?

Me: He really said that?!! Er No? No I don't think I'm boring lor.

Mum: I think you're very boring. Do your friends think you're very boring?

Me: Er. Ok lar.

Mum: Must be. They just never say only.

-

Me: Jie. Your. Breath. Stinks!

Jie: Aiyahhh. Never mind lar...

Me: You never mind I mind!!!

Jie: My boyfriend don't mind you mind for what.

Me: Your boyfriend very poor thing.

Jie: His breath is worse than mine can.

-

Dad: How come you got so many boyfriends?

Me: Where got???!!!!

Dad: Every time also see you go out with boys.

Me: NOOOOOO. Where got??

Dad: Never mind lar. You're growing up. These kind of things are very common wan. It's very natural.

Me: Don't have!!!

Dad: Anyway boys are easier to get along than girls. Boys right, either don't like or like you. If they don't like you, then your can be friends. Very good friends also can. If they like you, then you die already. Understand?

Me: HAHA. Understand.

-

Jie: I think daddy is watching porn right now.

Me: Argh. Do you have to tell me???

Jie: Its ok what. I also watch porn. Its a very healthy outlet.

-

Deb: Sometimes I wonder which drama serial my boyfriend gets his lines from.

Me: Taiwan serial?

Deb: He doesn't watch that kind.

Me: Hm.

Deb: Maybe indian.

-

As you can see, my family is crazy. And they have great punchlines! I love my family. :)