Friday, March 14, 2008

It is so hard to emotionally distance yourself from a person. I wish I never mended the bridge I burned. Should have watched the fire sizzle and scorch the wreckage black. But my heart was weak and it whispered a plea for redemption. There must be something, something still salvageable? There must be... ...

There was nothing left. There was nothing to save. I knew this, and yet I listened foolishly and clung to an empty hope- the kind of hope that carries out sedation before burying you alive.

Now every word is too sweet it aches. I don't want them. But what a waste. What a terrible waste. They are like opulent uncomfortable clothes, or a diamond ring that doesn't fit. You laid the perfect red rose in the wrong hands and it is wilting while the thorns prick my flesh in revenge.

Maybe when the rose falls, maybe when this unreadable smile slips, you can catch a trace of the secrets behind. I yearn for something different, something simple, something more tangible to taste. Maybe then, the bitterness and resentment will fester and explode. Reality will rise like a tidal wave and smash the whole thing back into its proper place.