Was very late for class today, so I threw on this super large shirt that I usually only wear at home and headed off to school. This girl whom I've always thought was gorgeous kept waving at me frantically. Years of low self-esteem and unsuccessful meditations on low self-esteem have trained me to see myself as invisible. I am part of everything, I am part of nothing, I am free from free from free, I am ooooommmmmmmmmmm.... Sleeeep. I'm just not used to people, especially physically attractive people, making eye contact and looking unnaturally happy to see me. Frankly it scares the shit out of me.
Her incredibly animated flurry of hand gestures gave me great foresight into her absolute failure in jobs which require decipherable hand signals, say, like those middle-aged uncles who stand in the middle of the road and point discriminatingly at cars. "You! Turn left! You! Right! You! Stop! STOP! PASSENGERS WALK!" She looked like she was flagging a taxi or fervently worshipping Cleopatra with a fan made out of peacock feathers. I safely decided to assume that she was. I walked right past her and she yelled out my name. I turned.
"Wow I love your shirt!" she exclaimed, "I've always wanted to try something like that!"
There was something strangely... Strange about those lines. Was it a compliment? Why was it even a compliment? It's like saying, "Wow I love your shirt! Because it would definitely look better on me than it does on you." Or let's say we replace the item, "shirt" with an equally personal possession like, "boyfriend": "Wow I love your boyfriend! I've always wanted to try something like that."
It's interesting how girls always use roughly the same words when complimenting each other. "Your skirt is so nice!" "Your shirt is so nice!" Everything is nice.
The more creative statements go something like: "I like your blouse, it makes your boobs look damn huge sia!" Or, "Oh my gawwd, I love your shoes! Where did you buy them from?? It really flatters you! Your feet looks so much smaller!" It amuses and intrigues me, how there is such a need to attribute clothing to the enhancement of the human body. You will never hear guys say, "I like your jeans, it makes your dick look damn huge sia!" Or, "Oh my gawwd, I love your jeans! Where did you buy them from?? It really flatters your dick!" Okay... On second thoughts, guys wouldn't say, "Oh my gawwd." More like, "Yo. Nice jeans you got there. Loving it man. I see it does wonders for the size your cock." But then again, I might be wrong.
I blushed automatically anyway, and when I thanked her for the compliment, I really meant it. Funny how you simply know what a person's intentions are, even if the words they say or the things they do don't match up to it. It's the same funny and sweet way in which we ask the ones we love, "Eat already not?" just to show that we care.