Babies learn to walk by falling. Babies learn to walk by holding their mother's hand.
My sense of space and distance has been altered. When I want to say that there is too much food, I say that I am not an X. When I want to say that I cannot walk very far, I say that I do not have X's legs. When I want to say that I want to give up, that I am stupid, that I do not care about anything anymore, I say that I am not YOU. And so, I learn who I am by declaring who I am not.
Loneliness is the empty space which you used to occupy.
You make the boundaries and the perimeters of my world. When you are the darkness, I am the light. When I am the light, you are the darkness. You are my alternative universe. You are my mirror- You are what I want to see and what I do not want to see. There is always a distance between the mirror and the image, and the infinite distance of the mirror which extends and repeats the extension.
My hand is cold because your hand is hot. Your hand is covering my hand and giving me the warmth that I lack. Your hand is two times bigger than my hand and so my hand is small and your hand is big because my hand is small.
I can afford to be insane, because you are sane. And when you are insane, I am sane. But no, that is not exactly right. If you are my mirror, you are a reflection of who I am. You must be a broken mirror. But no, that is not exactly right either.
I have been thinking, that perhaps, I am that creature that appears when the spaces between our foreheads, the bridges of our noses (your's crooked, mine barely there), the indentations on our upper lips, the downward slopes of our chins and the gaps between our crisscrossed fingers disappear; when the air that we breathe in and out merge and vanish and the darkness and the light blends and swirls and turns into a single solid colour. I think that maybe I, we, I am, we are, I am that colour.