Friday, July 29, 2005

I am at Si Min's very humble house, listening to Passenger seat by Death cab for cutie over and over again. Beautiful song. Was sent to me by Fengji who I must declare has awesome music taste. Go bug him to send you songs. Haha.

Passenger Seat lyrics

I roll the window down
And then begin to breathe in
The darkest country road
And the strong scent of evergreen
From the passenger seat as you are driving me home.

Then looking upwards
I strain my eyes and try
To tell the difference between shooting stars and satellites
From the passenger seat as you are driving me home.

"Do they collide?" I ask and you smile.
With my feet on the dash
The world doesn't matter.

When you feel embarrassed then i'll be your pride
When you need directions then i'll be the guide
For all time.
For all time.

Someone from our school passed away today. How do you feel? There are several avenues at this point.

1) You feel nothing.
You don't know her. Okay, you admit it's really such a sad thing, you feel for her, for her family, for her friends, but it really doesn't have anything to do with you. You go about living your life. It's just another rather dramatic episode in JC.

2) You gossip.
Okay this is just so damn exciting man. Let's talk about it, you know, huddle together and wonder why and how she died. Oooooh... Come on, let's make the possible reasons for her cause of death really nightmarish and disgusting. Let's shock ourselves. This is fun. We can socialise this way you know. We can make use of this event to really really get to know each other.

3) You feel numb.
You know you're supposed to feel sad. Yea you know, what the hell, you've spoken to her before... Why don't you feel a thing? You start to wonder how human you really are, or is sadness the only appropriate expression for you, for anybody, to show that you truly do care? It is an expected emotion yes, but is that all you are allowed to feel?

4) You cry.
Why do you cry? Do you miss her? Are you angry with that someone up above? Why her? Do you cry for yourself? Cry for all the things you never got to tell her or do with her. Are you guilty? Do you cry because everybody is doing it? Do you cry to gain attention?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm... Shows a lot about human nature doesn't it? Which avenue is right? There are probably a lot more that I'm not picking apart for my own sick analytical self. Does it even matter? I was quite taken aback by some of the things I heard, and how some of them reacted to the news. Majority of them seemed so... ... selfish? It's all about you. Her death is just an outlet for you to do what you want for yourself.

But how else are you guys supposed to feel anyway?

But who am I to judge?

How do I feel?

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey send that song to me. Can't manage to find it online :)

- Miao

estelwen said...

hey faith... my house is grandiouse or wadever u spell it lar... not humble lorx... jkjk... hey i cried juz now... after everyone left... sick... haix...
i like the way u write this... its just my sentiments too...
when this thing was announced, i suddenly found my self looking at this sch crisis at the third person's point of view... it's weird... like i'm juz nt frm this sch but a total outsider... i dun noe... i'm so confused now...

estelwen said...

check out my nice singapore lyrics!

Godwin said...

haha no don't bug me!

personally, i was somewhat... perplexed, by why Mrs Ho was crying that way (when she was speaking to the J2s), was she really that close to the girl? and then my friend told me females are just sensitive and will just cry even if it doesn't affect them, mm oh well whatever...

Anonymous said...

There are several ways people reacts to tragedy like this. Curiosity is part of human nature, and the lack of information would bound to start rumors. In any case, while sympathy is a normal feeling when we deals with such cases, tears can't be forced, esepcially if one does not even know the person concerned.
-Strider-

Anonymous said...

hey.. nice entry there..
it's very true.. but i mean some people can't help but to gossip.. but we gossip to find out the reason y she died, because we care and are concern for her, to find out what drastic thing happened? not to use it as a topic to talk about?! it's such a sensitive issue, and one not worth talking about if your trying to socialise and joke..

well i was also very sad today though i dint know her personally.. people who don't feel anything , are people who don't have a heart though.. like the selfish people.. ya..

nice in-depth comments though!

Anonymous said...

hey.. nice entry there..
it's very true.. but i mean some people can't help but to gossip.. but we gossip to find out the reason y she died, because we care and are concern for her, to find out what drastic thing happened? not to use it as a topic to talk about?! it's such a sensitive issue, and one not worth talking about if your trying to socialise and joke..

well i was also very sad today though i dint know her personally.. people who don't feel anything , are people who don't have a heart though.. like the selfish people.. ya..

nice in-depth comments though!

-jaded-

Quanmin said...

I cry because she is my friend. Because I cant help remembering her and the memories. Because I think it's such a waste. Because I know I will miss her.

qt said...

hahha. simin, ur lyrics are so FUNNY!!!!!! hey, i cant tag at ur board. so i'm in faith's giving u ur comments. lol

estelwen said...

shit my taggie got prob arh? tag at the other one lorx... actually i like the bottom one ..hehehe... me talking crap...

estelwen said...

Anonymous said...
people who don't feel anything , are people who don't have a heart though.. like the selfish people.. ya..

hmmm... i do not think so... i didn't really feel anything after this incident..

Anonymous said...

I agree with Si Min. At the very most you just feel sorry for her family, her friends and all those people who know her, but no matter how much you want to feel sad about her death you just cannot cry.

- Miao

estelwen said...

hmm... i think it's nt really abt crying or nt...it's more abt whether u feel anything or nt... oh well... i sigh at the fragile human life and i laugh at the stupidity of human nature to change the world when it all ends up in nothingess...
heard before this line frm romance of three kingdoms?
滚滚长江东逝水,浪花淘尽英雄。是非成败转头空:青山依旧在,几度夕阳红。

白发渔樵江渚上,惯看秋月春风。一壶浊酒喜相逢:古今多少事,都付笑谈中。