Thursday, September 22, 2005

"Do you know I love you?

And that I tried to save you?"

She wrote those words down and I know I will remember them forever.

I want to tell you the same thing, with as much or even more passion and concern than there ever was before.

Do you know you are not alone?

I am here.

I want to help you.

If you would only see, that there is so much more to life. So much more than your own pain, your own sufferings, your own misery. I could list a million other people who have it worse off than you, but I will not because I know you know them too. You know of their existences, and yet, although you know of it, you cannot help but feel... ...empty. Yes, you are lucky, yes, you are more fortunate than some, yes yes yes, but still... But. But. Why? Why do you still seek for something more? Why do you envy others? Aren't we all different, with our own talents and flaws? Yea yea all man are born equal, but some are more equal than others right. What is missing? Are you going to study your life away? Why do you do what you do? Where are you going? What do you really want? What has happened to you? Laugh when you can, and be strong, and oh I don't know, keep doing what you always do to get going, think of death from time to time, recently a lot more because it's fun and it's a quick and easy, albeit selfish solution to all problems. Keep telling yourself that there's something, there must be something more more more, further ahead in this rat race that you're plodding through aimlessly without breath.

Do you know I feel it too?

There will come inevitably a time, or times, when you will begin to question yourself, when you will think of what you've been through or are going through, and in doing so, lose completely all sense of direction, for there are no correct and black and white answers.

But do you know that you are not alone?

Everything will be OK. We fall, it isn't anything new. We've fallen and risen countless times over time. You can handle it. You will be OK.

Talk to me.

I want to hear you.

I want to hear your voice.

Because I know that there is so much more to you, beneath this superficial mask that you put on.

Because I understand.

Can you trust me?

Can you trust yourself?

I promise I won't hurt you.


qt said...

hey.i dun care whoever u are dedicating this entry to.. but.. i feel like crying after reading this entry lorx..

Anonymous said...

i guess when u are lost, u really dun see anything... i mean it.. i'm so srry but i really dun see anything... maybe u are dedicating this to me, maybe u are not... i heard this is in sec 2 countless times... but i really dun see it there... maybe that's what makes me a "depressed" person... it's just that u dun see the light no matter how ppl guide u... maybe that's how the person i tried to help felt as well... what i really know is, what am i doing to my life? why can't i see it?
and what i really want to say is.. thank u... i know u are there for me... u jump i jump haha..